It’s true. Our May 2, 2020 wedding has been rescheduled to July 17, 2020.
When we started planning our wedding back in November of 2018, we spent countless hours searching for venues in multiple cities before settling on one in Albuquerque where Kyle grew up. We were in love, and we set our date for a Saturday the following May to be at the start of the warmer season and when all of the flowers would be in full bloom. It also gave us plenty of time to plan everything else. It was perfect!
In the following months, calls were held with every vendor I could find for every possible position we needed. Florists, DJ’s, photographers, transportation companies, hair and makeup artists, and day of coordinators. We carefully selected the perfect team for us, scoured through contracts, set up timelines, and planned out our budget. We tactfully selected our limited guest list (we both have large families and tons of friends we wanted to invite, but we also wanted an intimate wedding, and that’s why we picked the venue we did). We took photos, created save the dates, and hand addressed them all. We designed invitations and paper goods, sourced candles, shopped for wedding clothing, did marriage preparation classes with my church, and made hotel blocks. We planned a two week honeymoon to Italy, booked hotels and excursions and flights and transportation. And emails. And calls. Hours of work. And when I say hours, I mean hundreds of hours.
Honestly, I loved it all. There were hard things, but mostly we really enjoyed the planning process and felt so strongly about the vendors we had chosen because they were such a joy to work with throughout it all. Our families and friends were so supportive and excited for us, and there was nothing we could complain about. A tiny issue here, a minuscule change made there, we were ahead of schedule and ready for the day to arrive when Coronavirus hit just two and a half months before.
Shit. This is scary. Wow, it’s in Italy now? Does this mean we need to cancel our honeymoon? CAN we cancel our honeymoon? How long will this last? It’s getting worse. Do we need to think about changing our wedding date? Do we need to cancel our flight to Albuquerque in March to finalize things? Wow, we really do need to move our wedding.
Writing that email to our venue asking about possible new dates for our wedding was heartbreaking. I was angry. So angry about the fact that we spent so much time and energy planning so far in advance to make everything perfect, and it was being ripped away from us. I was afraid. So afraid that there wouldn’t be any dates that our vendors and closest family and friends could make work. When is even far enough to postpone? I was anxious. The anxiety was the worst of it all. For at least 3-4 weeks as the virus spread there were so many “what if’s” running through my mind every day. People asked me constantly what I was going to do. It was hard to focus on anything else.
I cried and I worried. Kyle was always there as a comfort and a rock to manage my emotions. And really, so was everyone else (my mom and friends are angels). But until you go through something like this, nothing can really explain how it feels. There wasn’t much else we could do but say a prayer and then move into taking action mode.
With our inquiry sent, things proceeded to come together. Amazingly enough, the next day our venue announced a closure to their site and hotel until May 1, one day before our planned wedding date, so we felt more sure than ever it was time to change the date. There were three Fridays available in July and a suggested Monday in September. That was it. And a guardian angel must have been watching over us because within those dates, July 17 was available for our entire family, our bridal parties, and every one of our vendors.
I honestly couldn’t believe it as every email came through. In that day, there was a an enormous weight lifted from us that we had been trapped under for the entirety of last month. The last thing we wanted was our families and friends to feel pressured into traveling, or worse, getting them sick because of our event, so to have the opportunity to move our event was such a blessing. And on top of it all, no one asked us for additional fees. Not one of our vendors complained about anything. They had been reaching out to us before it even happened, and we felt so lucky to have such thoughtful and amazing people working for us.
Was a Friday wedding in the middle of the scorching desert summer what we planned? No. Are we sure some people won’t be able to make the new date due to baby delivery dates, previously planned vacations, and financial difficulty due to the pandemic? Yes. Did we have to cancel our welcome party due to scheduling conflicts? Yes. All we can do is be thankful it was possible at all, and truly not as much of a burden as you might expect.
In the last week, we’ve spent time figuring out hotels, new timelines, new contracts, writing emails, and updating our website and spreadsheets to start a new wedding guest count. We are not sending new invitations, but instead sending emails with a new image of our updated invitation. We canceled our honeymoon and plan to reschedule it for a later date when it is more certain we will be able to go. There is still fear that COVID-19 will be everywhere come the new date, but there is really nothing else we can do at this point.
Our perspective has changed quite a bit. We feel so blessed to have each other. We’ve spent two weeks confined to our home. We’ve cooked together, worked better as a team, and enjoyed each other’s company in a slower pace of life. We’ve focused on health and how we can help the community. This was one of the biggest pains for me in the last two weeks. I felt so selfish to be so worried about MY event and MY problems when the entire world was literally dealing with a Pandemic and worrying about losing their loved ones. A wedding is a snippet of time in your life, and so yes, it doesn’t really matter in the long run. But as a bride to other brides, you are allowed to grieve. This is really hard. It’s been a lot of work to plan and taken a ton of emotional strength to make happen. Re-planning is also a lot of work. But you can do it, and you will feel better when you have some peace of mind. And as everyone seems to tell us, you will have a great story to tell in 20 years.
Photography by Jacqueline Vega Photography